The most rewarding endeavor

NORWALK — Being a new mom is challenging, to say the least. It's the most difficult, yet rewarding endeavor I've ever taken part of. Since I was pregnant through a pandemic, everything was a bit out of whack. There were many, many tears that came with losing two jobs and initially not knowing what was going to happen with the world. My husband, Zech, was supposed to hear the heartbeat for the first time at the first appointment he wasn't allowed to attend. It broke my heart. You eventually get used to having to attend every appointment alone. It still hurts, but you get used to it. I was lucky when I went into labor. Zech was two hours away for his last day of training to be a manager at Texas Roadhouse. We wanted to hold off calling him home as long as possible because I was ready for him to be home for good. His bosses knew his excitement and told him to come home a little early and finish his last testing here in Sandusky the following week. On Aug. 19, 2020, I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl we named Eliana. Not having anyone else in the hospital with me was a bit nerve wracking at certain points. Some of the information given to me was quite overwhelming simply from not being familiar with the words. Nonetheless, we pulled through; Zech was absolutely amazing throughout our time at the hospital. I didn't want to admit it, but I did have some postpartum depression. There isn't enough time in the world to constantly take care of a baby, clean the house and take care of yourself. This was something I struggled with. Though I was extremely appreciative of Zech cleaning and getting me my needs, I felt stuck because I had to sit there and feed a baby constantly. I breastfed for two weeks before I couldn't take the stress anymore. Breastfeeding was something I had always pictured myself doing. I knew all of the health benefits for both mom and baby, so the thought of stopping was both adding to the depression and taking it away. It honestly took a few months for me to realize that it's OK to not do things the "perfect" way. In the long run I had better mental health because I had a little more time for myself. Having the title of 'mom' isn't code for knowing how to do everything the correct way; it's code for driving the struggle bus with the wheels still turning. It's code for getting up every day and trying. For waking up and the first thing on your mind is having to feed a baby or change their diaper before you even think about that shower. Eliana is 8 months old now; it does get easier. One of my favorite things about being a mom is being able to watch her grow and learn new things every day. I look at her in constant amazement that I helped to make something so beautiful and so inquisitive. It feels good to know that a little human feels safe when they're held in your arms. I want to wish all of the mom's a wonderfully enthusiastic Happy Mother's Day. Just know you're doing such an amazing job.